To Be Happy...
I was living in an apartment and had a neighbor above me. She often played her music loudly enough that I could hear it in my apartment. About once a month, I'd hit my limit and go up and very nicely ask her to turn it down.
THE OLD ME:
Would have constantly complained to the manager every single time (I would have NEVER let up), until he made her STOP. I'd sneer at her anytime I'd see her, making it clear I did not like her one little bit.
Click here to see what "The New Me" did...
THE NEW ME:
In a solid year of this, I never once complained to the manager and never treated her with anything but kindness.
Regardless, over a period of time, she started to get nasty when I'd go up there, and after that she wasn't friendly at all anymore.
Then my Doberman, Jetta (my baby), died, and another neighbor brought a vase of flowers and left them at my door.
The upstairs neighbor came home and when she walked past the flowers, she knocked them over, spilling the water. Another neighbor saw her and called me.
I picked up the flowers and brought them inside and gave them water. I put one in a vase and took it to her door and left it with a note that I hoped the flower brought her some joy that day.
I shocked myself! I thought, "Who am I? Why am I not angry?" All I felt for her was love and sympathy because I knew she had to be in a lot of pain to do something like that.
As Gary Chapman teaches in his amazing book, Love As A Way Of Life, which I had been reading at the time, love (which is all I want - and try - to offer others), is not provoked. I understood her, I accepted her, I forgave her, and I loved her.
That was the first time someone was hostile to me and I just loved them back. I amazed myself! When someone acts like that, they need love, not condemnation.
Holding on to anger and grudges is toxic and if you do, you can never be happy. Anger and happiness are diametrically opposed.
It felt wonderful to have such peace and to treat her with compassion.
Want more "OLD ME"/"NEW ME"? LOL Ok... How about more tips on how you can stay (or be) HAPPY in an UNHAPPY World? Yeah! Just click here and I'll send the next one right to your inbox so you don't miss it!